Ash

…. I have not dropped off the face of the earth or simply ceased to exist. This is however, for a number of reasons, the first time I’ve logged into Buddyslim for a couple of months.

Those reasons include

1.

2. Oh some other stuff about house guests, internet burnout, my computer dying, my wife’s computer dying and well whatever really, it all pales in comparison to 1.

Perry was born two weeks ago today, and now I’m back at work (hence having access to a computer again) and missing him. Mother and child are both doing well after a relatively problem free birth.

I’ve pretty much ignored my diet and the gym during this period. However I think I’ve only put a few pounds back on (although it’s been a week since I weighed myself) and I’m planning to get back on track after the weekend. Perry was the reason I made the decision to lose weight/get in shape in the first place… and he’s going to be the reason that I keep going. The last couple of months have been such a hectic, stressful time that I think taking a break was the best thing for me.

Anyway, sorry I disappeared without much of a trace….. but Perry says hi!

Hi Buddyslimmers. I haven’t been around much for a number of reasons. I keep going to write a blog entry and then realising I can’t think of anything to say. Today I’m just going to keep typing and see what happens.

First off I want to say thanks to those of you that have been in touch to check up on me, show concern and/or drop me a booster. All is well with life, impending baby, work, diet etc. I’ve been very busy and have a lot going on at the moment and as a result Buddyslim has slipped down my list of priorities a bit.

In terms of diet and exercise I will admit I’ve been slipping a little. I’m still losing a steady 1-2 lbs a week and I’m happy with that, but I’ve been a bit more relaxed about it. I’m kind of on the fence with regards to whether or not that’s a good thing. Being relaxed, enjoying myself but still losing weight sounds like a good thing! But at 290lbs I still have a long way to go and I don’t want to get too slack.

Actually I strongly suspect I will maintain or even gain a little this week. A big part of me thinks this is something I need mentally to keep myself in line! Obviously I don’t want to gain weight (it’s just more I’ll have to lose!). But if it serves to get me going again it’ll probably be for the best in the long run.

Well that’s all I can think of. Happy Thanksgiving to those that are into that kind of thing. Hope you have a pleasant and safe holiday!

My feet don’t hurt anymore.

It’s late, I should be in bed, I don’t usually blog at this time. But I felt like sharing. My fet always hurt, if we walk for any length of time, standing and talking to people, by the end of a long day it could be agony. But I just noticed today….. they don’t hurt anymore.

People tend to focus on appearance, getting into smaller jeans, positive comments from people. They’re all good…. but it doesn’t compare to my feet not hurting. It goes on the list.

* My feet don’t hurt
* My knees don’t sound like a bowl of rice crispies when I squat
* By back doesn’t hurt when I’m washing up
* I don’t have indegestion and heart burn after every meal
* I’m more uhm regular
* I’m not as tired all the time
* That nagging shoulder pain I always used to have seem to be taking a break
* My snoring isn’t as bad. Well it’s still bad but apparently not as bad

That’s not just due to losing weight. A better diet has helped in general. I also think lifting weights has really improved y posture and a lot of the aches and pains going away are because of that.

Well… thanks for letting me share. Hope you’re all having a good weekend. I’m off to bed with my not sore feet

Of all the things I’ve been accused of being in my life fashionable is not one of them! I don’t pay too much attention to what I where and tend to be a jeans and t-shirt kind of guy. So me actually posting about clothes and what I’m wearing and stuff is rather unusual.

Yesterday on the way home from work I had to do a bit of shopping and the supermarket I went to had a small clothes section so I thought I’d check it out. For the last year or so I’ve had to order stuff online and I rarely bother checking the regular ranges in stores. I need a new jumper (or sweater I think you call it in the US) so on a whim I decided to check it out. As always the sizes only go up to 2XL (I’m usually a 3XL or 4XL) but they had some cheap thin jumpers I liked the look of so I decided I might as well try it on and it fit!  Huzzah. They were even on special so you could get a second half price, so I got two.

This morning I put it on to wear to work and not only does it fit it’s a really good fit, it looks good on me. My shoulders (I have wide shoulders) really fill it out and the waist is loose enough that my gut doesn’t ruin the line at all.

At that point I decided it seemed a shame to ruin the effect with my clown jeans. My jeans are currently a couple of sizes too big and would pretty much just fall straight down if not for a belt. Even then they’re loose and baggy…. hence “clown jeans”. So I pulled out my special going out pants. Now these are really nice trousers I bought a couple of years ago. I really, really like them, the cut really suits me and the material is very comfortable. The problem was when I brought them they were a little too small. I could do them up just, but they didn’t really fit. As I put on weight I couldn’t even do them up so they’ve been gathering dust for a while now.

But huzzah! again. They fit perfectly now. In general I don’t want to wear them to work because the material is very thin and I think they’ll wear out too quickly if I wear them every day. But… the way I see it in a few months they’ll probably be too loose anyway, so I might as well wear them while they fit and get some use out of them.

So I’m sitting here styling in my regular store-bought clothes and feeling pretty good about myself as I type this. The first thing someone said to me when I got to work was “Are you going to a job interview or something?” because I look a lot smarter than normal. I mean looking smart is not really a big deal to me. I kind of like the scruffy look I’ve cultivated over the years…. but hmmmmm, maybe being scruffy and not being fashionable has more to do with body image and availability of clothes than it is actually a conscious decision. Maybe as I lose weight I’ll put a little more thought into what I wear.

So last night my wife had a dream that I lost 8 pounds this week. Hmmmm, not very likely. If it’s a sign, it’s probably a sign that I talk about my diet too much more than anything else! I’ve had a couple of one pound weeks. That’s fine, every week I lose something is good and a step towards my goals. But I know that if I make more of an effort I can do a little better. I’d rather be averaging two pounds a week, something I know I can do.

After a rather naughty weekend food-wise I’m back on track now. I’m taking a break from weight lifting and am planning on doing some cardio every day this week, possibly for two weeks, hopefully then I’ll feel less burnt out on lifting.

Obviously one of the big reasons a lot of us are doing this is for our health. I’ve joked before about “not wanting to drop dead from a heart attack before I’m 40″, but it’s not a joke. This is something that was brought into sharp focus for me earlier this week when I found out someone I used to work with had done just that. I hadn’t seen him in the best part of a decade and never knew him that well, but it was still quite a shock. He a really big guy (probably 400lbs +), smoked like a chimney and led a completely sedentary life.

I know it’s not a black and white thing. The healthy can die young, the morbidly obese can have a long, long life. But it is obviously a massive contributing factor towards life expectancy. To be aware of this and not do anything about it just seems foolish. I’m not a suicidal person, I don’t have a death wish, I’m as far from a danger/adrenaline junky as you can get. I don’t like to live dangerously. However, despite that, I have over the course of the last 15 years or so lived my life in a way that invites illness and an early death.

Stepping back and taking a look at that it strikes me as being more than a little idiotic. I mean I like to think I’m a fairly sensible person but how could I be that dumb? The good thing is I’m doing something about it now. However, I still kick myself for not doing something about it earlier. If my wife had not become pregnant I don’t think I’d have ever done something about it. I’m sure eventually I would have made some half hearted efforts towards dieting and losing weight. But lacking that specific catalyst I can’t see myself as ever having made a serious effort…. doing reasearch, joining sites like this etc.

With regards to weight loss there are a few things that really annoy me. I’ve been fairly vocal about unscrupulous companies and people trying to make a quick buck out people desperate to lose weight. However the flipside of this are elements of the “Fat Acceptance” movement that are in denial about the health risks inherent in being overweight. It’s the “acceptance” aspect of this that concerns me. I’m against discrimination in any form and I fully support people fighting for their right to be accepted in society if they feel they are being discriminated against. However some of these groups seem to blur the line between accepting the people and accepting the condition.

Here’s some denial in action from a “Fat Acceptance” blog:

“The alledgedly link between health and weight has been vastly exagerated by the popular media. Consequently, it is one of the chief excuses for perpetuating prejudice against fat people ….. In fact, my feelings about health and weight loss did not even change much when I was diagnosed with diabetes”

Reading stuff like this blows my mind.

I think these people make the mistake of blurring the line between accepting the person and accepting the condition. I guess I’m preaching to the choir on this site. We’re not prejudiced against fat people here, I’ve never seen anyone say anything remotely derogative about anyone’s weight on this site. But we all know the truth, that being fat is not good for you, and we’re all doing something about that.

I haven’t been blogging so much recently. So I thought I’d just start typing and see if anything happened…..

* Work is really busy at the moment but I’m actually kind of enjoying it. I say kind of because if I could choose not to be here I would! I’m sure the same is true for most of us. I think my new ritual of a coffee and reading at lunch to make use of my lunch break (rather than eating it at my desk) is really helping. It breaks the day up and I’m not looking forward to going home in the morning, I’m looking forward to lunch, so something good doesn’t seem so far away!

* If I downloaded American TV shows I certainly wouldn’t incriminate myself by writing about it on line. But if I did, I’d probably say that Pushing Daisies is a really good show.

* I’m currently reading Neal Stephenson’s Baroque Cycle and it’s really good, I mean seriously good stuff. One of those series that I just don’t want to end. He’s one of my favorite author’s and Cryptonomicon is one of, if not my favourite books. It’s one of those books that while I’m reading it I feel that it’s so perfect it’s almost as if it was specifically written for me. I think I’ll read it again when I’m done with this one.

* I’m still in a bit of a lull with diet and exercise at the moment. I seem to be losing a steady 1-2lbs a week, which is great. I’m eating a lot better than I have done in my life (although my diet could still do with some work), I’m also getting more exercise than I have since I was a kid (again though, I’m getting a little slack with that at times). But it doesn’t feel quite right. I’m still motivated but I guess the initial novelty and excitement has worn off. I feel like I need a bit of boost to get the momentum going again. Until that happens I’m not complaining though. I’ll take slow, steady and sustained any day of the week.

* Related to that I’m thinking of taking a break from weight lifting for a couple of weeks (I’ll just do cardio instead). I just feel a bit burnt out when I’m lifting at the moment.

* I really wish I was one of those people that just lived for the gym. I guess the Catch 22 here is that if I was one of those people I probably wouldn’t need to lose over a hundred pounds right now!

* Whenever I say or hear someone else saying “I Wish” all I can think of is “If wishes were horses we’d all be eating steak”. A really silly quote I heard somewhere and can’t remember where. Ah, Google to the rescue… it’s from Firefly (TV show).

Friday evening
After work but before dinner
Turn light on in bathroom (scales are solar powered)
Turn computer on
Don’t look down for a few seconds (when the number will have stopped moving)
Weigh until I get the same weight three times
Run calc on computer
Multiply weight by 2.2 (kg to lbs)
Enter weight on http://www.physicsdiet.com
Enter weight on Buddyslim tracker
Reply to group email if it’s there (Hi Cindy!)

If I’ve lost weight order chinese  :mrgreen:

Well, to be honest if I’ve maintained or gained weight order Chinese as well most Friday’s  :???:

Hmmm, least exciting blog post ever! I guess there’s no real superstitions there, not looking at the scales until they’ve stopped moving is the main one. Anyone have any unusual rituals or things they always do for weight-ins?

I’ve noticed a few bad habits creeping back into my lifestyle. My gut feeling is I may actually see a slight increase in weight this week which would be the first time since I started this over three months ago. This is not necessarily a bad thing… I mean it obviously is in one way, but in another way I think it’s what I need.

I’ll try and explain: I’m still motivated and I’m still enjoying this new journey I’m on and I’m still looking at long term goals. But I think every now and then I’m going to need a kick in the pants to keep me on track. I just feel like I’m about due for a kick in the pants right now. I guess part of me knows that and is letting the bad habits creep back in to try and tempt fate as it were. I should be able to rein it in and get back on track without the kick, but it’s hard to do without a specific event (a bad weight in in this case) to act as short, sharp shock.

That said, even with a few bad habits I’m still miles ahead of how I was eating a few months ago. I’m back at the gym this week as well having a much needed (body and mind) week off.

Well, a short blog and a big all over the place. Lots going on at the moment.

So according to my profile I’m suddenly 37 years old! What the….. ? When did this happen? Why did no one tell me? Anyway, this sudden increase in my age has sent me spiralling into the depths of depression and I’ve started stuffing my face with all manner of wicked treats and paying no heed to the consequences.

Hah! Maybe not. Today is the one day of the year where I can eat whatever the heck I want. The funny thing is I don’t actually want that much. I think a big part of me is still evaluating everything that goes into my mouth and appraising whether or not it’s worth it. Kind of like a calorie cost/benefit analysis. I’ve had a few treats, but I’m not going overboard.

I’m also not used to it. I had a toasted chicken and bacon sandwich and a pack of crisps at lunch and it’s really sitting heavily in my stomach. I’m just not used to eating  things so heavy and rich at lunch. If someone were to offer me a slice of cake right now I’d pass. Not out of guilt, or because I’m dieting…. but just because I don’t feel like it. Some of you won’t see that as a big deal “You’re feeling full, of course you won’t have cake”, but I know some of you also understand how this is so alien and new to me. In the past being full was never a reason to stop eating if something nice came along! Now it is. Little changes like that still amaze me!

Another change I noticed a couple of nights ago. I was really struggling trying to get my new computer to work and it was all going horribly wrong. I was getting upset and frustrated so took a break and headed downstairs. My gut instinct was to hit the kitchen and devour everything I could find… but I didn’t. I still felt the urge to, but the urge just wasn’t strong enough anymore. Likewise the next day I was in a bit of a funk because I still hadn’t been able to figure it out. In the past I would have responded by eating like a man possessed. I mean the quantity of food I could put away in the name of comfort eating bordered on the obscene. But I didn’t, I just didn’t want to and I could kind of see the bigger picture where some short term comfort would only have a negative effect (weight gain) that made me feel worse later.

For those of us with a lot of weight to lose it can be tedious and frustrating and seem so very slow. But for me changes in my behavior and personality like this make up for that.

Oh and I got the computer working last night! I don’t really play computer games so much any more (because I’m trying to make better use of my time and get healthy, not because I’m too old for it ) but I now have a seriously powerful state-of-the-art machine for when I do get the urge. Special thanks to Mrs Ash (hello! If you’re reading) for letting me get it and putting up with me when I was struggling with it.

Yes, yes, it’s not actually dirty, just an expression. Don’t sue me for false advertising.

I’ve been extra quiet this week due to a combination of things. Work is just monumentally busy and at home I’m building a new computer (which isn’t going quite as well as I’d hoped) so I haven’t been online much at all. While I haven’t been doing much buddy stuff or forum stuff recently I have been trying to keep up-to-date on other people’s blogs and comment on them. But this week even that is a luxury I don’t think I have time for.

I’m taking a break from the gym this week as well. Not due to laziness or lack of motivation. It just felt like I needed a rest from it and I decided to listen to my body. I may go for a couple of runs but no weight lifting (which means no early mornings, yay!). I’ll be back at it next week I’m sure.

That’s about all, hope everyone is doing OK and staying on-plan. Have a good rest of the week!